Katie Heyes

For as long as I can remember, being quiet has always felt like a burden. It won’t come as a surprise to many that I’ve struggled with my self-confidence. I viewed my social anxiety as a cruel deterrent discouraging others from taking me seriously whether that be socially, academically or professionally.

“When I read about Naomi Osaka withdrawing from the French Open my first reaction was one of empathy.”

Take for example, my decision to apply for Head Girl. I had one fellow student come up to me and tell me “you shouldn’t go for that, you’re too shy; it wouldn’t suit you.” Additionally, my high school head teacher told me multiple times I shouldn’t apply to a different sixth form. His own words were “because you’re so shy, you probably wouldn’t be able to cope in the new environment.”

For years, I’ve tried to interpret the following statements as tongue-in-cheek. “Bless her, she’s so quiet,” “Oh, she’s shy,” “You’re so quiet I didn’t even know you were here.” However, as time went on, it became more and more degrading and actually resulted in worsening my social anxiety. In retrospect, it also probably became the catalyst for a lot of depressive thoughts.

Whilst many of these comments didn’t have malicious intent, it has only solidified the belief that shyness is a burden: plaguing my life as a constant source of frustration, inhibiting me from going far in my chosen pathway.

Thus, when I read about Naomi Osaka withdrawing from the French Open my first reaction was one of empathy.

Earlier this month, the world number 2 tennis player made the decision to withdraw from the French Open and consequently Wimbledon. Prior to this, she was already fined $15,000 after refusing to speak to the press to protect her mental health. She has previously spoken openly about her struggle with shyness and depression which made her consider taking a year’s leave.

With all these pressures from the press mounting, and already threatened with expulsion, Osaka announced her withdrawal. Her decision, alongside her heartfelt statements about her decision posted on social media, sparked discussions surrounding the disregard of athletes’ mental health. “The truth is I have suffered long bouts of depression since the US Open in 2018 and I have had a really hard time coping with that. Anyone that knows me knows I am introverted and anyone that has seen me at tournaments will notice that I’m often wearing headphones, as that helps dull my social anxiety. Though the tennis press has always been kind to me (and I want to apologise to all the cool journalists who I may have hurt), I am not a natural public speaker and get huge waves of anxiety before I speak to the world’s media.”

“Anyone with social anxiety knows how alienating and daunting it feels to suddenly be thrown out of your comfort zone.”

In a separate statement, she wrote “I’ve often felt that people have no regard for athletes mental health and this rings true whenever I see a press conference or partake in one. We’re often sat there and asked questions that we’ve been asked multiple times before or asked questions that bring doubt into our minds and I am not going to subject myself to people who doubt me.”

Fellow sports personalities, Serena Williams, Billie Jean King and Katarina Johnson-Thompson voiced their support for Osaka. Williams empathised with her struggles, stating: “I feel like I wish I could give her a hug because I know what it’s like. Like I said, I’ve been in those positions.”

“We have different personalities and people are different. Not everyone is the same. I’m thick. Other people are thin. Everyone is different and everyone handles things differently,” she continued.

Despite Osaka’s feelings clearly being shared by many sports stars, other individuals were having none of it. Piers Morgan not only had the hypocritical audacity to label her a narcissist, but displayed zero understanding for the situation with his shameless attempt at slander. He described her as ”an arrogant spoiled brat whose fame and fortune appears to have inflated her ego to gigantic proportions.” If that weren’t enough, much like with Meghan Markle, he dismissed her mental health struggles publicly, with The Daily Mail claiming that he “weaponiz[ed] mental health to justify her boycott.”

“I still avoid certain situations for fear of reliving old painful memories, whether that be certain places or groups of people. “

Morgan, once again, is perpetuating damaging mental health stigmas which will discourage others from speaking up for fear of ridicule. Anyone with social anxiety knows how alienating and daunting it feels to suddenly be thrown out of your comfort zone.

From my own experience, I spent every waking moment living in fear of involuntarily saying something humiliating or embarrassing. As such, staying quiet became a coping mechanism. Thus, I’ve always been able to empathise deeply with Osaka’s predicament, which must be all the more heightened when competing in prestigious tournaments such as Wimbledon or the French Open.

However, Morgan’s comments do unearth a lot of fearful memories from years ago. If I struggle with social anxiety will people take me seriously at work or socially? Will people just see me as lazy? I still avoid certain situations for fear of reliving old painful memories, whether that be certain places or groups of people. Sometimes this led to me missing my own university lectures. Whilst I knew going to those lectures in person might have helped me progress quicker in the module, I’d set the necessary boundaries in place to look after my mental health. And Osaka has done the same thing. She set clear boundaries for herself so that her mental health would not suffer as a consequence.

So, my big question for the day is, why should taking steps to look after your mental health by setting boundaries for yourself be vilified or snubbed? We wouldn’t think twice about stopping or easing the intensity of physical training if your body wasn’t up to it.

By insisting that vulnerable individuals must speak to the press, thus potentially compromising their mental health, we could risk losing great sports players. And why should being socially anxious inhibit you from going far in your chosen career path?

Featured image courtesy of IGfotojonas via Pixabay. Image license found here. No changes were made to this image.

Hi, I'm Katie, a Modern Languages graduate from Durham University and I'm currently training for the NCTJ qualification. I have been doing freelance writing for a number of magazines such as Palatinate UK, Sur in English and the Indiependent with a particular interest in Theatre and Film. I hope to share my passion for these particular subjects for future magazines.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *